This Titan's Clash is closer to Zach Snyder's 300 than to The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad. It's written with a solid R rating in mind with nudity, sex and lots of gore-rific ugly deaths by really bad ass ugly monsters. It should rock your baklava, if you know what I mean and I think you do.

The characters include a number of familiar names from Greek mythology, and a few that have popped in from other mythological Monster Manuals. The main humans are our hero PERSEUS- son of Big Greek God Daddy ZEUS and quickly forgotten human QUEEN DANAE, and ANDROMEDA, slutty principessa of the kingdom of Joppa, daughter of wise KING KEPHUS and foolishly vain QUEEN CASSIOPEIA. Other deities are TIAMAT-power hungry Sumerian mythology Goddess of the Oceanic and Cosmic depths and her Darth Maul, from Egyptian Mythology: SET THE VOID.

Evil Inhuman characters include not-going-to-win-a-beauty-pageant-anytime-soon MEDUSA, with her hair of snakes and gaze of death and the Bible based LEVIATHAN (no, not the 1989 Peter Weller "Alien Underwater" movie)-the Kraken- the biggest, baddest beastie of the ocean.

Also, PESHET, Andromeda's sfinx [sic] (half human/ half cat) handmaiden and VIDALIA, an earth goddess who assists PERSEUS are two wonderful new characters to this telling of the story and are going to be the subject of urgently written fan-fic for years to come.

CREATURE SPOILERS BEGIN

Clash of the Titans the Remake is grown up, sexy and violent, filled with political intrigue from the tops of Mount Olympus to the Throne Room of Joppa. The quest PERSEUS undergoes is populated with all manners of creatures like Sylphs, Lotophagi, Strix, Minotaurs, Centaurs, Nephilim, Giant Scorpions, Anubite Jackals, Hyena Men, and Pegassi, and never feels like sloppy seconds from a dusty textbook. I'm so pleased to report the well written script sent me scuttling to the dictionary several times with vocabulary-above-a-ninth grade-level, like scutes, limn and (I love saying this word) feculence.